Not so fast, you Serb.

And the aura of Kirsty COventry increases yet again, with what could essentially be Zimbabwe's only gold, and last medal at these Olympics. She outdoes Margaret Hoelzer in the 200-meter backstroke. Meanwhile, Phil Dalhausser and Todd Rogers dump Martin Laciga and Jan Schnider in men's volleyball.

Not on my watch, Milorad Cavic. Not on my fucking watch will you spoil the party. Michael Phelps outdoes the American racing for Serbia in an Olympic record time. Andrew Lauterstein of Australia gets the bronze.

He's tied with Mark Spitz. Bring on tomorrow. That's for busting our water polo team, Milo.

I will say that this was not his best swim, but he got just enough to win. And that, everyone, is what matters.

NEXT!