More Olympics thoughts on Day 14

The Serbs were roughhoused by the USA, doubled up in a 10-5 win. The gusy wrap up their games against the always-intimidating Hungarian team, led by the likes of Gergely Kiss and Norbert Madaras.

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Man, this has been nothing but a crap Olympics for USA Baseball, as well as USA Softball. I'm putting my money on both sports returning in 2016. The USA gets a shot at payback against Japan in the bronze medal game.

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JUst like the women, it will be Brazil vs. the USA in the gold-medal game, A 3-1 victory over Italy makes it a Clash of thr Americas at Beijing.

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This time, the men did NOT drop the baton in the 4 x 400 m relay, finishing first in their heat. Meanwhile, Bryan Clay gives the USA another gold in the decathlon.

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The modern pentathlon, a.k.a. The Search for Eastern Europe's Greatest All-Around Athlete to Come Home Later In Life In A Box, concluded. Lena Schoenborn led the way for Germany's women (Heather Fell got silver for the Brits and Victoria Tereshuk won the Bronze for the Ukraine), while Andrey Moiseev took homne another gold for the Russians. A couple of Lithuanians in Edvinas Krungolcas and Andrejus Zadneprovskis took home silver and bronze.

I really think they should scrap this event. It's just plain antiquated. The IOC, in their next meeting, should do this:

* Scap the Modern Pentathlon.
* Bring back baseball and softball.
* Bring in rugby sevens and karate.

If it sounds hard to do, it's because the countries who vote against it suck.

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Bring on Spain and the Gasol brothers. A 101-81 victory lands the USA in the gold medal match, while Pau and Marc busted the Lithuanians 91-86.

You Frenchies need to quit talking outta yer derrieres.

Olympic Quick Hits, Day 3

Pop quiz: Suppose you have a situation involving a Frenchwoman and her love affair with an Italian beau. Both of them are swimmers. And then, this guy flaunts his infidelity by sleeping with a fellow Italian woman, also a swimmer. The French girl's life is emotionally crushed. As luck would have it, both of them qualify for the 400m freestyle final in Beijing. What do you do?

Answer:
Get a couple of competent Brits in Rebecca Adlington and Joanne Jackson, and sandwich them around American Katie Hoff. And that, my friends is what happened.

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Rowdy Gaines, you are a bloody toof for exploting Hoff's orgasmic groans of disgust. You shagbag womanizer.

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The French 4 x 100 M relay team is praying for divine intervention a la Tour de France 2000's era. They are praying to their personal Jesuses that the Americans doped.

Well, just like Beijing, God can't control everything. But if your prayers are somehow answered, none of you are welcomed into my Maison de BoBA. And zat, my friend, is de bottom line. Hon hon hon.

Archery is a sport where we clearly suck at. The USA lost to Taiwan in the men's team quarterfinals.
By 4 points. Mercy.

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Cuba seems to be our bogey team in women's volleyball. Out here in the states, we can only hope that our ladies bounce back, becuase I think our men will fare better than these poor MILFs. I can solace in the fact that their guys wouldn't stand a chance against David Lee and the gang.

Ugh. Horrid performance. They wouldn't stand a chance against Penn State's ladies. Venezuela's gonna be gulping right now.

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God bless Lauren Wenger. Her game winning shot with the women's water polo team a player up gave the USA a 12-11 victory. It was a sharp contrast to the 108-63 farce of a game against their respective basketball counterparts.

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Out of all the non-USA threads that the basketballing chicks wear, I like Australia's the best. I don't know; I just dig hot sheilas in tight fits like that.

Wake me up when September ends.

It’s great to see the underdog triumph, because it proves that on any given day, a top team can be felled, and it reinforces that timeless adage: You have to play the game. So I have see some top teams fall from their perch on September 29, 2007. West Virginia lost to South Florida, 21-13. Oklahoma was edged by a Colorado field goal, 27-24. Auburn also booted a field goal to drain Florida’s swamp, 20-17. Texas was given a Kansas State-style lynching, 41-21. Rutgers was routed by Maryland, 34-24. Clemson got shacked by Georgia Tech, 13-3. Illinois outlasted Penn State, 27-20. And Florida State squeaked by Alabama, 21-14.

However, calling this Saturday “Insanity Saturday” is just Pat Forde’s shyster way of stretching the impact of this weekend’s results to make it look like the end of the world. It’s not being fair to the top teams who are still alive, specifically the top two teams. USC and LSU are still on track to be in the show. The Trojans defeated Washington, 27-24. The Tigers, after a shaky start, defeated Tulane, 34-9. Cal and Ohio State are still in the running, too. The Golden Bears dismissed Oregon, 31-24, while Ohio State continued on its merry way, 30-7. Wisconsin, Boston College, and Kentucky also survived, so they are the latest contenders. And the only difference between the interceptions that Hawaii and Idaho made was that the Warriors were able to convert them into points (48-20 Hawaii).

Keep in mind that App State was not involved, either. The Mountaineers, after being upset themselves by Wofford, got back to business, dismissing Elon, 49-32.

Meanwhile, the USA gutted themselves of any hope to salvage 3^rd place, starting Brianna “The Hag” Scurry against Norway. I predict that the Norwegians got this one in the bag. The world will have ended if the USA wins this one. The world will be saved if the USA finishes 4^th, and Greg “I am Hope Solo’s worst enemy, and will be lynched for my faggotry” Ryan is sacked.

In other news, my Anaheim Ducks are feeling London Burning right now. Hey Randy Carlyle, call 99999 already! Punk. On the other side of the world, the Angels continue their warm-ups, felling the Athletics, 3-2. In Canada, the President’s Cup is all but going to go to the Yanks, as they are 7-up on the rest of the world.

And the Cubans will be crushed tomorrow in Valdivia, Chile. You may have our number in baseball, Fidel Castro, but these soon-to-be defectors are due to roll over and die come Sunday Bloody Sunday. It’s their duty.

St. Jimmy and Jesus of Suburbia, send help. And bring some Novocain with you while you’re rolling down this boulevard of broken dreams, bruised egos, and American idiots. This is a request from the Bedlam.

I just had a gut feeling...

Today, the Dodgers and Angels won. Usually when that happens, the Long Beach Armada will lose. And they did. I didn’t know what the score was, but I don’t even want to know. One more victory, and the Chico Outlaws will get the title...and I expect Darrell Evans to be fired as manager, as soon as it can be done

This is the type of slump that teams with losing records in the majors would shake their heads at.

Actually, there will be two coaches that will be gone. Los Angeles Galaxy manager Frank Yallop will be sacked very soon. It’s only a matter of when it will be official. The Galaxy lost in the SuperLiga final to Pachuca, 4-3 on penalties. Coupled with the LA Riptide falling to Philadelphia (god, I hate that city now) in the MLL Championship Game, it’s been a living hell for Los Angeles this week, save for the Halos.

Meanwhile, as the college football season starts, the United States and Argentina will meet in the final round of pool play. Up to this point, the USA have been crushing their opponents, but they could (finally) face a stiff challenge from Argentina. They may not have Manu Ginobili, Fabricio Oberto, or Andres Nocioni, but the fact that they are also undefeated up to this point (rallying against Brazil) means that unless they do the predicatable the past several games and roll over, the USA will finally get to measure itself. Argentina won the gold medal in men’s basketball at Athens in 2004. Three more wins for Coach K’s crew, and the wheels are set for the mythical Dream Team IV.

On Saturday, a day after watching the convocation on campus, I will go ahead and get ready to renew my coverage of the Mission Football Conference. There are five teams I have yet to preview, so I am going to work around the clock to get that done.

I feel like singing a song right now. This is one I made up out of pure closed-space boredom.

Bright lights city gonna set the nets,

gonna set the nets of fire.

There’s a couple of Beijing 08’ berths on the line

to keep the stakes up high.

There’s thousands of spectators waiting out there.

And they’re all watching, the bookie may care.

And I’m just a bookie with money to spare, so

FIBA Las Vegas. FIBA Las Vegas.

Now I wish that there were more

than forty minutes in a game,

but even if there were another four and four,

I wouldn’t hang my head in shame.

There’s Deron, Anthony, Chandler, and Kidd on the wheel.

Howard, Amare, Prince and Redd keeping it real.

Miller and Chauncey Billups making blocks, boards and steals.

FIBA Las Vegas. FIBA Las Vegas.

FIBA Las Vegas, with your qualification

and the entire nation watching

all those jumpers getting drained.

FIBA Las Vegas, Kobe bringing the Showtime,

King James bringing it on primetime.

If they win it once, they’re going to win again and again.

I’m gonna go on a run, I’m gonna have me some fun

even if it costs me some NBA dimes.

And when I get that gold medal, then I’ll always remember

that I had a swing of a time.

I’m gonna give it everything I got.

Coach Krzyzewski, please, let my dunks stay hot.

3-pointers and free throws made on every shot. Swish!

FIBA Las Vegas,

FIBA Las Vegas,

FIBA Las Vegas,

FIBA, FIBA, Las Vegas!

Yeah!

“This is madness!” “Madness!? THIS IS VEGAS!”

Tim Duncan, where art thou? The USA assrapes the Virgin Islands, 123-59. I wonder if Kobe Bryant is still viewed with contempt here in L.A., for his tirade with the Lakers. I think so. And I hope he apologizes for his faggotry, because that was a low blow.

Meanwhile, the Galaxy lose…again, this time to Chivas USA, of all teams! 3-nil. Why is Yallop still our coach!? The bloody cunt…I’ve had it up to here with his futility. And the nightmare continues…

The Angels lose, and the Mariners win. I fear the Halos’ year is going to hell in a hurry.

At least the Armada clinched the second half. And our women’s soccer team impaled Azusa Pacific, 5-0. And I got a B in Business Law. Oddly enough, in my junior college Business Law class, I also got a B. Co-incidence? I just hope I got the same grade in Management.