ISML 2015: It's Way Too Early For The Kongou!
Megumi Katou wins Winter Diadem, Utaha Kasumigaoka wins third place
By Jo-Ryan Salazar
The Bedlam on Baltic Avenue
May 15, 2015
Gone
are the days where Megumi Katou can consider herself to be boring,
ordinary, and unattractive material. Those days are behind her, as she
defeated Kongou 2601-2513 to win the 2015 International Saimoe League
Winter Diadem. Meanwhile, Utaha Kasumigaoka defeated Yuudachi, 2721-2389
to win third place.
At Blessing Software headquarters in Tokyo, a.k.a. Tomoya Aki's house, there were hugs, tears and sighs of relief.
"This
is a great day for us because I knew that we would leave our mark,
however, I am disappointed that the ISML organizers were classless
enough to not allow us to compete in the preliminaries proper," Aki
said. "We feel that a number of faces that are in this tournament do not
deserve to be in the regular season. Megumi and Utaha would have picked
up a number of victories and both would even make headway in the Stella
Division.
"While these two victories satisfy us, we feel that
the ISML has done Utaha and especially Megumi a disservice by consigning
them and Eriri to this mini-tournament. Neither of them will be
eligible until next year and it will be a long and rocky road ahead
before they finally get to compete in this tournament for real. We will
focus our attention to the 2channel Anime Saimoe Tournament and other
tournaments to build the stock in our characters.
"I also feel
that I would have been a worthy competitor in the Male Division,
although I argue that this part of the tournament is unnecessary and was
only made to appease to the female voting public. The women don't vote
in this tournament anyway, so there is no need for a Male Division.
However, I feel the organizers forgot someone, and that someone is me.
"To
sum it up, we are on our way to untold success this year. We hope
2channel's voters follow suit with the ISML and give one of my partners,
whether it is Utaha, Megumi or Eriri or even Michiru, to have a shot at
succeeding Saki and Nodoka as the Saimoe Prime Minister of Japan. We
thank you for your support and please be sure to buy our new visual novel
which is out right now."
At the Etajima Naval District, Admiral
Kensuke Tanaka ripped apart the 2601 who voted for Megumi and the 2721
who voted for Utaha.
"These voters are not smart people, but I
can forgive them a bit because most of them aren't from Japan," Admiral
Tanaka said. "Let's be honest, if 2channel will put Madoka and Saki on a
pedestal and ISML will not, I cannot have any respect for this competition
that purports itself to be the world's premier anime character
competition. Our fleet girls are capable of regrouping from this and we
have made it a priority to destroy Megumi, Utaha and Eriri in 2channel
because we know that voter base thinks differently from ours. It has
done so numerous times and it will again this year.
"This is a
disappointing day for us but this has galvanized our fleet to work
harder, smarter, and win back the trust of the voters. We don't settle
for second place here on this fleet. We have never made it a habit of
finishing second to anyone, not even ordinary, boring trash that has no
business of being relevant in this country.
"You saw how Saki and
Nodoka dominated last year's 2channel Anime Saimoe Tournament. We will
be their successors. Japan loves to play Kantai Collection and we have
a growing army of male and female admirals, myself included, of course, because I
made this game. I have no doubt in my mind that the voters who chose
Megumi and Utaha are going to be in for a rude awakening when the saimoe
tournament that the world should really consider seriously takes place
this summer.
"That fledgling visual novel team in Tokyo calls
themselves 'Blessing Software.' Well, we will lay a curse on them and
consign them to failure in 2channel AST. There are a number of shows
that are relevant in ISML but not in the real Saimoe, and Saekano is one
of them. This will be our year. This. Will. Be. Our. Year. You will witness the real might of our
fleet this summer. We will not be stopped and there will be nothing but
tears on the faces of those who dare challenge the might of our KanMusu.
We shall prevail. We will win. Because we...are the Kantai Collection!"
ISML
2015 Aquamarine Match Day 1 is scheduled for June 7, 2015. Vote for
your favorite candidates at InternationalSaimoe.com and join the ongoing
debate. And keep it right here on The Bedlam on Baltic Avenue for
continuing coverage of the world's premier anime character
competition...the International Saimoe League.
